Monday, November 5, 2012

Looking back after the wedding...

There are a few things that I will never forget, some things I'm sure I missed and of course a few things I would change.

I remember being relaxed all day, excited to see my husband-to-be and ready to say I DO!  Other than worrying about the weather and how it'd affect my hair there was little to worry about.  I remember the look of Jeremy's face when he saw me, how I almost started crying as I walked down the isle, how our niece kept making up smile as she made adorable noises that only babies make.  How much I loved seeing my nephews and hearing that I took the oldest's breath away when he saw me get out of the car. Being so excited to walk down the isle that I kept telling other to have everyone sit down so we could get the wedding started.  My farther-in-law being so nervous performing the ceremony that he announced us as husband and wife but forgot to say you may kiss the bride. 

I loved taking pictures out at the lake.  Spending time with the wedding party in the limo. I had fun with the girls being silly.  Everything flew by, I really thought we had more time for photos. Of the ones I have seen I love them.  I don't always love the way I look.  I saw some photos from friends and family and could only think, "Would I like the photo better if my dress had been different or if I had had a reception dress to change into?" I know I'd had thoughts about my dress prior to the wedding but the main thing brides don't take into account is that the dress looks good when on for short periods of time.  We never think about what it will be like to wear the dress for hours.  As the night went on there were times that I couldn't wait to get out of the dress.  I got tired of pulling it up on the top or picking up the skirt to dance, worrying about tripping over it as I danced with my husband, father and friends.  Although my dress was a burden at times, I still had so much fun.  Dancing like a fool, taking pictures in the photobooth, spending time (not as much as I would like like) with family and friends, making memories that we wouldn't be able to change.

If I could have changed anything, I would have had the rain stop in the morning, I would have hired a wedding planner and if money permitted I'd of had the wedding of my dreams.  I'll wish upon a star for that someday.

Until I can think of more to write....

Thursday, October 4, 2012

7 days...

In less than 168 hours I will be tying the knot to a wonderful man that I can't wait to call my husband.  Almost everything is finished at this point.  I need to finish some of the many DIY projects that I've been working on.  Clean up my apartment and pack up the decorations.  Relax, Get my nails done, check in to the hotel, decorate the ceremony and the reception, finalize all the details and most of all GET MARRIED!!!

With the last few days and a tight budget there are some things that will just have to wait.  I really wanted to create welcome baskets for my out of town guests.  I also need to finish the wedding favors or possibly make a candy bar for guests to create their own favors.  At this point I'd settle for homemade cookies wrapped in the favor bags. (I'd need some help to get that done.)

My ultimate goal to is finish most of the things on my to-do list by Sunday so that I can put the finishing touches on everything, decorate the reception venue and relax.  I'd love to take a nice long relaxing bath the night before my wedding.  (I hope I can get a few things from Lush so that I know I'll relax!!)

I want my wedding day to be as stress free as possible.  I've already told the maid of honor that she will be answering my phone and filtering my calls.  Planning a wedding can be difficult at times.  All along the planning process I wanted a fun day that was care free and enjoyable.  I wanted planning to be stress free and most of the time it was but the last year has been quite the roller-coaster.  The one thing I was getting sick of is everyone putting in their opinion without taking mine into account.  With the last few weeks I know I've moved to doing many things on my own mainly because I didn't want anyone else's view of how my day should go.

A few weeks ago I was watching a few different bridal movies and I totally agree with Emma from Bride Wars, "Sometimes it's about me, ... Not all the time, but every once in awhile it's my time. Like today.  Now if your not okay with that, feel free to go"  On my wedding day I don't want to hear, see, or deal with drama,  While getting ready I want to do what works for me.  If you don't like some part of my getting ready attire or my wedding day look, keep it to yourself.  I only want to hear your opinion if I look like a clown (which I won't because I've done about 3-4 run-throughs now).  I want people around me who want to help and will listen to what I need/want and not do what they think I need/want.   After all this is my ONLY wedding day so it has to be full of things that go right and wonderful memories.

This will probably be my last post until after the wedding.  In 7 days I will no longer be  LalaLovelyBride, I'll be LalaLovelyWife!!!

Friday, August 31, 2012

Just over a month...

Just over a month left until I say I do!!  This is both exciting, nerve-racking and most of all stressful. I was hoping at this point that I wouldn't have much left to do.  However, we don't have attire for the groom, the flowers are CRAZY expensive, I still need to finalize decorations for the reception and ceremony, taste and confirm the reception menu, book the hotel room for the bridesmaids and I to get ready, finish the alterations on my dress, pay off the photography, review the playlist with the DJ, select and purchase the groomsmen's gifts and attire, reception shoes(for me), welcome bags, and anything else that I'll remember as soon as I post this (becuase that is just how my life is lately!) OH and I really only have about the month of September to pull this off because lets face it.  My birthday is 10 days before my wedding and I will have NO time to do anything then.

I have a meeting tomorrow with another florist to review styles and cost.  Hopefully she will come in under budget.  Otherwise the bridesmaids are getting fake flowers and I will order my bouquet online.  I still have to figure out the decorations for the ceremony and put the finishing touches on the reception.  However doing this usually requires money and since I've paid off the reception there really is no money to do anything else right now.  FML (Did I mention that I have this sinking feeling that something is going to go horribly wrong soon?  Like the reception hall catching on fire or tons of last minute cancellations.)   

Decorations:  The ceremony is at church and we have the large space, checkered carpet (that looks like it is yellow and green ish tones), green chairs, cream walls, no real setup for a grand entrance as a bride (short of entering from the back door and being seen by everyone who sits in the back on the left).  So how to decorate the large space and still get the feel I want is going to be difficult.  It will probably be a daily undertaking for the whole week prior to the wedding.  Drop off decorations into a classroom Sunday evening, arrive Monday and decorate the chairs, arrive Tuesday and stage or decorate most of the other areas, then Wednesday set up the isle (and pray that no one messes with it during youth night),  Thursday is the wedding so unless the boys go up in the morning and fix everything (which probably won't work or look the way I want it to)  I don't know what to do.

The reception decorations are looking closer to what I want, I just need something to add height to the room.  I can't decide what's missing.  I know I want to some element of a tree but according to other people if we have too many things it is going to look cluttered.  I want it to look elegant.  I want it to feel special and welcoming.  If I could have 2 tall elements per long table I would feel better.  I can't picture everything together and I need to be able to see it otherwise I'm not going to like any of it.  I want a candy bar and a photo booth station.  I want everything to look like the picture that inspired the wedding colors.

I know that a wedding is just a party and if at the end of the day we are married then it went perfectly, BUT I want the pictures to reflect the years I have put into this and the overall feel that I'm trying to achieve.  I know that there is more to write but right now I am exhausted and it's time to fall asleep.

Friday, August 3, 2012

What I want...

Lately I've been feeling a little bit insecure about many things mainly including upcoming wedding events.  I have my bridal shower and my joint bachelor/bachelorette party coming up and I don't know how to be the center of attention and feel comfortable.  I have a constant one sided headache and the medicine that I take for it made me gain a few pounds that I'm not entirely comfortable with.  So I guess what I am struggling with is trying to feel special when nothing seems to fit, shopping is frustrating and all I really want to do is curl up in a ball and hope that when I wake up I will feel better.  When I pick out what I want to wear to these special events I can't find things that make me match the emotions that I want to feel.  This is a special moment in my life and I want to feel that way but right now I just don't.  I don't want to have to plan these events or buy things to make.  I want to show up, play games, open gifts and enjoy myself.  Unfortunately I have to take part in the planning because it wasn't taken on my others in my wedding party.

There have been a few people who tell me to let them know if they can help or what I'd like them to do but the truth is I don't know what they can do because I don't always know what I want.  I have ideas but I have a feeling if I let others pick up things to me or take over tasks that it won't come out the way I'd like and then it'd be a wasted effort.  I have mixed feelings about asking for help because in the past when I did I got everyone else's opinions and no one asked what I wanted.  Instead of waiting for me to ask for help look things up that could be helpful.

I went out with my sister today and did the one thing I didn't want to do.  I cried. I don't like to talk about what is bothering me and the reasons I'm frustrated.  I grateful for some ideas but I'm not sure if I like the information I get.     I want the wedding to reflect who I am and the relationship I have with my future husband.  I don't want it to be full of things that other people picked for me.  At the same time I want it to look like everything belongs as far a decorations go.  I ordered something that I thought would work and be a lovely center piece and missed the fact that what I was ordering was actually very small. :(  I guess I just frustrated with everything and can't make up my mind on what I want help with, what I need help with and what I really want my way about.  

I want what I want and there just seems like no way to get it.  I want to feel healthy, beautiful and special.  I want to think of my wedding be able to look forward to it and not think that everything could go wrong.  I thought I'd get a lot more done by now with two months left but I guess I'm just lost.  I don't know what to do, where to go, what I should do next.

I still need attire for the men in the bridal party, flowers, ceremony and reception decorations, to taste and confirm the reception menu, cars, the DJ must play and don't play lists, meet up with the photographer and go over looks.   I still need to find an outfit for the parties that are coming up and how I will make myself feel special.  I'm not comfortable in my own body and going to my last dress fitting and praying that the dress will zip all the way many that feeling compound.  I've tried on a few dresses and most of them do fit the way I'd like, it they do if they don't make me feel special so it seems very pointless to keep going shopping.

Just my thoughts.... take them as you will......


Thursday, July 26, 2012

Inspiration ...

comes from the most unexpected places.  I went to the farmers market this morning and found some wonderful breads and fresh produce.  This struck me with inspiration for the bridal shower menu.

Baked Ziti, Bruschetta, Fresh salad, mini  Rosemary bread grilled cheeses, roasted veggies... with almost all the ingredients coming from the farmers market.  I overheard a few women talking about how the produce is still fresh and crisp a week later and tastes like if was just picked that morning.  This is the type of thing that we don't get when we shop at Albertson's, Vons or Smiths.  Where I live there is a farmers market every Thursday from 10am - 4pm.  With the Bridal shower being held on Saturday I could pick up the fresh produce that I need and have plenty of time to prep and make the items.  Not to mention we could pick up fresh fruit to snack on or use in desserts.  My mouth is watering just thinking about all this fresh and wonderful food.  =D

Menu:

Roma Tomato, basil bruschetta (with optional shredded parmesian cheese topping)
Baked Ziti
Rosemary grilled cheese
Salad - Green leafy lettuce, grape tomatoes, cuecumbers, bell peppers, carrots, other assorted veggies
Pitta chips with humas (maybe haven't tried this but sounds interesting)
Roasted eggplant, zucini, squash, potatoes, onions, carrots, etc. (whatever I see that would look and taste yummy together)

Desserts,
Fresh fruit
cupcakes
fruit tarts or shortcakes
French Macaroons (I might have to buy these but I really want to try them because they don't have coconut!!)

Iced teas, Fresh Lemonades, Italian Sodas and punch to drink!!

I think we have a menu!! :)

Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Bridal Shower Wish List

So my bridal shower is coming up and I was trying to think about things that I reaFlly, really hope that I receive.  I recently went to Sephora and found a wedding look that is just want I wanted (at least the eye portion).  So I would really like to get some of the items from the Too Faced collection.  I like the natural eye pallet and their eyeliner(it's like a pencil blended with a liquid).  I'd also be interested in trying Kat Von D's tattooed eyeliner in black.  When looking through my makeup collection I realized that black eyeliner is something that I don't have yet.  


Bride hoodie and pants  personalized to by BabyGigglesCreations, $85.00    This would be so cute and comfy to wear getting readyThere are a lot of items on my registry that I'd like.  I really, really, really, REALLY want a Kitchen-aid Stand Mixer!!!  (I know it's a long shot but I REALLY want one!!) I want a cakepop maker/pan.  I like the idea of making cake pops I'm just not a big fan of frosting so a cakepop that is all cake would be amazing.  


reception shoes!?! I want these!!  Size 8.5 pleaseWedding hair accessories BOW CHARM  Bridal by hairbowswonderworld, $85.00Traditional Items:  A monogrammed robe would be adorable.  Mrs. hoodie to get ready in for the wedding day(matching sweats would also be wonderful).  Reception shoes  I'm looking into getting a pair or two of Toms sneakers (One pair to try before the wedding, one for the wedding reception).  They have a cute pair of ivory grosgrain shoes.  They look like they are made out of ribbon.  They also have a pair that are sparkly but I have mixed feelings about that pair.  Anything in my favorite colors, polka dots, and/or bows.  Charms for my charm bracelets, accessories for the wedding.  (I'm still looking for a hair comb or some type of hair accessory)   Picture frames and other sentimental items. I want to be able to look back at this experience and have happy memories.  I don't want to be worried that I didn't get what I really wanted or what I hoped for.  



Along with thinking about the bridal shower I keep thinking about what I am going to wear to the bridal shower and for the rehearsal/ rehearsal dinner.  My bridal shower has a 1950s housewife theme and it represents my love of things classic and vintage.   I want something simple, understated yet elegant.  I love this picture -------> It represents the feel of the look I'm going for.  Simple, elegant and classy.  (I would even attempt to keep the heels on for as long as possible.) 


Rehearsal dinner?     So Audrey HepburnWell this is all I can think of for now.  I'll add more if I think of anything.  Check out my pintrest page for a lot more about me. 


I found this list on my phone.  I guess I forgot about it until after I posted this.  
Bridal shower wish list: 


  • Mandolin slicer 
  • Spice rack with spices 
  • Kitchenaid mixer 
  • Food processor
  • Storage canisters (for flour, sugar)
  • Casserole dishes 
  • Cooking utensils 
  • Cutting boards 
  • Knife set 
  • Soda streem
  • Grill pan and griddle pan
  • General home Storage 
  • General girly items... Lingerie, sleepware, bridal sweats, TOMS sneakers, bare minerals makeup 

Saturday, July 21, 2012

Less than 3 months to go...



At this point in the wedding planning process I figured I'd have a lot more done.  I wanted to get everything done this summer so that I knew I'd have time to relax.  Well as we are full aware things in my world don't go as planned.  Stress with work and other things has kept me from doing everything I wanted.  The limitations placed on decor by the venue are proving to be a challenge and I can't figure out a clear idea of what I want.  Every time I think about my wedding lately it causes nothing but stress.  People tell me to ask for help or let them know if I need anything but I'm not sure how to verbalize that I need WAY too many things done and the people I would love to turn to for help are doing nothing but adding more stress.  I should be elated that my Bridal shower is coming up soon and that the joint bachelor/bachelorette party is later that night but I'm just worried that none of it will work out and that it will be an EPIC fail just like my birthday usually is...(which my birthday so happens to be 10 days before my wedding) .
Mini Birdcages with Chalkboard Label  - Set of 5 - Place Settings, Wedding Chalkboards, Table Numbers
I would love to just order the bird cage centerpieces that I saw on etsy that I love but I can't seem to make up my mind as to what overall look I want when everyone walks into the reception.

I have ideas of what I want (and they would all require a different locale a huge tent with chandeliers, fabric draped walls, a beautiful view, flowers everywhere, candles lit on every table, a huge dance floor, open bar with signature cocktail, long tables with food served family style and have the backdrop of a stary night sky) and what I don't (a few random decorations that look tacky and do not match what so ever).  At times I wish that I am just dreaming that that everything will come together beautifully but I'm beginning to have my doubts.

I've started the alterations on my bridal gown (I am not doing them myself, David's Bridal is) and I'm still not sure of the overall look that I want for when I walk down the isle.     I know part of the issue is the lack of self confidence I have right now.   As of lately I have not liked the way my body looks in anything and it is something the ripples through when I go clothes shopping.  (This is probably why I'm leaning towards a themed bridal shower versus the ones I've seen or been to in the past.)  I would love the traditional stuff (getting ready items for the wedding day and the other really girly stuff) but I feel out of my element in that area and I don't want to be embarrassed by any gift that I receive.  

I wish I felt more confident all around with everything that I am doing but I'm beginning to doubt myself in all aspects of my life.  I'm constantly frustrated with everything that I attempt to do or project I take on.  I wanted to be a very DIY Bride and take pride in knowing that many aspects of my wedding were going to be designed, assembled or crafted by me.  But now it seems like a huge burden that I don't want to take on.  A few people have tried to be helpful but they don't know most of the information that they would need to help.  I can't figure out the flower arrangements and when I would find the time to assemble them and store them to have handy for the day of the wedding.  Not to mention the cost of flower if I choose not to do it myself have order them from a florist.  I really don't want to pay someone over $100 per bouquet when I can make them all for $80-150 total.  

There has been a few times recently where I just want to throw in the towel and say good riddens to the whole thing.  I can't figure out what I need because I don't know what has been purchased by others on my behalf.  I more worried about paying off the things I contracted to do (venue, photographer, cake, catering, hotel room block, etc.) rather then getting everything decorated, welcome baskets assembled, etc.   Why can't I just have the fairy tale that is in my head?  My subconscious response is that real life is not a fairy tale but my hearts says that your wedding should be like one.  It should be the story of your love for the person that you are joining your life to.  By the end of October I will have promised to love, honor and cherish a wonderful man whom's love I couldn't bear to be without.   Because in the end...(this photo says it best)