responsibilities

So I was searching for bridal party responsibilties online and came accross two lists that I had to combine.  The girls list is from another blog (myotherhalf ) and the guys list came from an internet search (Bride and Groom) . 

Responsibilities: Maid of Honor

You are the bride’s right-hand woman and strongest ally through the entire process. You’ll be there to support her emotionally and to help her make decisions for the big day. Your responsibilities include:

• Coordinate with other bridesmaids
• Host bridal shower with help from bridesmaids
• Plan bachelorette party with help from bridesmaids
• Keep record of gifts received at various parties and showers
• Spread the word about the couple’s registries
• Hold onto the groom’s wedding band on wedding day before they exchange vows
• Hold bride’s bouquet during the ceremony
• Arrange bride’s train at appropriate points in the ceremony
• Bustle bride’s train after the ceremony
• Sign marriage license
• Make a toast at the reception
• Collect gift envelopes and keep them in a safe place
• Purchase wedding day attire (dress, accessories, shoes)

Responsibilities: Bridesmaid

As a bridesmaid, you’re considered an important person in the bride’s life. Just like the maid of honor, the bride also looks to you for suggestions and help. A bridesmaid’s responsibilities include:

• Help the maid of honor with bridal shower
• Help the maid of honor plan the bachelorette party
• Spread the word about the couple’s registries
• Assist with DIY projects (invitations, wedding favors, etc.)
• Help direct guests to their seats
• Purchase wedding day attire (dress, accessories, shoes)

The honor of being a part of the bridal party comes with a cost. It’s not cheap to be a bridesmaid, so you’ll need to be prepared for the financial responsibilities as well. Stay tuned for next month’s “What About the ‘Maid?” as we break down the costs of being in the bridal party.

Best Man

• Plan and host the bachelor party.
• Rent or purchase wedding attire that is the same as the groom's.
• Attend rehearsal and rehearsal dinner.
• Arrange for transportation to ceremony for self and groom.
• Arrange for transportation of the couple as well as self to the reception.
• Arrives with the groom at least 1 hour before the ceremony.
• Helps keep the groom calm.
• Supervises groomsmen and ushers.
• Holds bride's wedding ring if not being carried by the ring bearer.
• Escorts the Maid (Matron) of Honor during the recessional.
• Forwards payment to musicians and officiate from the groom.
• Stands to the right of the bride in the receiving line.
• Makes the first toast at the reception and reads congratulations telegrams.
• Dances when the music starts and asks other guests to dance.
• Transport newlyweds to the honeymoon suite or airport after the reception.
• Organize the return of any rented wedding attire for all men in the wedding.

Groomsmen and Ushers

• Purchase or rent wedding attire.
• Assist in planning and financing the bachelor party.
• Attend the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner.
• Arrive dressed at least 1 hour before the wedding.
• Fold and distribute wedding programs.
• Ensure that all family members have corsages/boutonnières before being seated.
• Seat guests as follows:
  • Single females are escorted on the right.
  • Single males should walk along the left side.
  • Escort the female of a couple on the right with her date walking behind.
  • Guests of the bride are seated on the left.
  • Guests of the groom are seated on the right.
  • Leave first few rows unseated to accommodate family members.
  • Seat the mother of the groom.
  • Seat the mother of the bride.
  • Roll out the aisle runner.
• Light candelabras, as needed.
• Escort bridesmaids during the recessional.
• Check for any items left by guests at the ceremony site.
• Collect ceremony decorative items such as baskets, pew bows, and aisle runner.
• Dance when music starts and ask other guests to dance.
• Decorate the newlywed's car.

Wedding Frustrations

So my goal is to spend less than $10,000 on my wedding and still get as many parts of my dream wedding as I want.  But because of this recession it seems that my wedding may not happen at all.  Cost is a major part of any wedding and trying to save up enough to pay for everything is driving me crazy.  Every time I work out a plan it falls apart.  If things don't start looking up soon I may have to start cutting a lot out and sacrificing my original vision. Our guest list is as small as we can make it without making people mad or offending friends and family.  Part of me is trying to stay optimistic and the other part of me is trying to get real and decide what to do about our wedding.  Should we change venues, have a smaller wedding, do we cut the guest list again and hope we don't offend family, do we ask for help paying, do we push back the wedding or do we just elope and have a traditional wedding later when we can afford it.

I'm getting really frustrated with our parents and conversations we have over the wedding.  Everyone wants us to wait yet it hurts us to be apart.  We will get the look of shame if we are living together out of wed lock and if we live together odds are we won't save much for the wedding.  Anything extra I can save now is going to be squashed when I have to start paying back student loans.  Part of what is upsetting is that I'm being told to save for my wedding, save for an apartment, and consider pushing back my wedding but I have my wedding dress hanging in my closet because it was on sale so it was purchased. (and to be honest I'm fretting that I made that decision too soon)

I honestly don't know what to do and I'm not sure how much longer I can be optimistic about the wedding.  I can only sacrifice so much of my dream and my plan before it's not even my wedding.  And if I'm not getting what I want I don't even think I'd do it.   So it seems like the choices are push back the wedding, elope/locals only wedding or not get married.  And I don't want to do any of those.  Where is the fairy god mother to make my dreams come true.  All I can say is HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dream Wedding

So while having a conversation with my fiancee I was asked if I could plan my dream wedding what would it be. So I decided to take it as a challenge to put together what would be my dream wedding from dress to location to honeymoon.    I will then compare my dream to the wedding I am actually planning.

DREAM WEDDING:
My dream wedding would be a beautiful outdoor ceremony and reception with a tent for dinner and dancing.  I would love to have a romantic yet casual style wedding with a bit of a vintage feel.  I want something that is just stunning and elegant but I want the guests to feel like they are being welcomed into my home and joining us for an intimate party in our backyard.  I want flowers everywhere and if you are in a fairy tail rose gardent.

Location:  Garden Wedding   in Napa Valley
 
Wedding Style: Romantic Casual
Wedding Colors: Emerald Green, Silver, Black and Ivory

Dream Dress: Amsale Tyler Gown or maybe something from Monique Lhuillier



A delicious cake with a red velvet layer as well as two layers of orange blossom cake with white chocolate icing and shaved almonds.   As well as a grooms cake made of devil's food with cheesecake mixture pipped into the cake batter and topped with mini Oreos,  the cake will be topped with cool whip and crushed Oreo cookies.

Flowers: gorgeous hand-tied bouquets of various types of roses in off white, ivory and cream tones as well as green and cream hydrangeas and orchids, as well as various displays of the same flowers with mixed greenery.

  



Now back to reality:

So far here is the wedding I'm planning:
A semi-formal church ceremony and cocktail bowling reception. My goal is to be as stress-free as possible.  My big ticket item (not including the reception) is going to be photography.



My lovely dress and a bouquet that I hope I can make without poking myself on the thorns.   We also hope to develop a signature cocktail.  We will also have a DIY cupcake tower with various flavors of mini cupcakes, which will be made by myself and a few of my bridesmaids.  Budget permitting I'll get the gifts that I would like for all of the members of my bridal part as well as welcome baskets for all of my guests rooms.  The colors for my wedding are the same as my dream wedding but the main details are scaled back or will have to be done DIY or possible made out of tissue paper.

Well it's been nice dreaming but I guess I should get back to the real planning so much to do and only 401 days to go.